Gender could be explained as differences between males and females to represent socially constructed socially and are based on social rules or norms. What are the rules? Simply put, social norms or rules are "ways of doing things" or patterns that become routine over a period of time. Society constructed of being masculine and being feminine were depending on sex differences even though it definitely different. Sex and gender are absolutely different. Sex is biological organs while gender is more like a spectrum.
The performance of females and males constructed by society based on gender perspective must always be feminine and masculine only. Feminine always refers to what society claimed females only have, including behave, act, language, dress, stuff, characters and so on. It also named as “females thingy” which means only females who familiar with it. Society created stereotype that females always be good at cooking, beautiful, kind, emotional and more. And masculinity must be the opposite of that. Masculinity is everything related to “males thingy”. It just like binary opposition of feminine and masculine or between males and females. Gender is cultural concept which tried to create a different role, mental characteristics, and -males-females emotional sides that developed among society. Different nations with many ethnics could behave different gender concepts, like if it’s Indonesia. Javanese and Bugis could be having different ideas in gender.
The most well-known gender diversity is it's characteristic. The female supposed to be nurturing, touchy-feely, soft and emotional. While male are supposed to be hard, no-nonsense and driven. All those differences are given serious impact over each gender. This bias affected every single part of their life. Just like head to toe. Every part of people must be concerned or depend on their gender role that leads by society. Language, dress, gesture, and so many.
In some cases female or male whom out of their role as who they are there will be always social norm or law created by society to punish them. It could be verbal or exiled by society. When a gender falls out of their supposed or expected character, it is perceived negatively. Society has power hence they made the laws.
As in social interaction, gender creates patterns between males and females. Research done by Underwood has shown over and over again that the vast majority of these interactions occur within same-gender groups: boys are members of boys’ groups and girls of girls’ groups which separately from middle childhood and into early adolescence. There are a lot of reasons behind that, culture, preference, strict parents, religion, idealism and so on.
They are connected usually in any part they feel the same whether emotional or just the same hobby. However, there is unfairness raised among friendships that aren't considered in a large club for males. In some cases, a relationship between two males are consider as deviated as if they are homo. Yet in contrast in female cases which consider as truly friendship. Gender constructed among society male friendship is more casual while female are more intimate and personal Because people think their relationship based on feeling. They perceive that female are always using heart.
This must be created double standard of gender differences. Once a double standard is activated, it affects the degree of ability that is inferred. In other words, once double standard applied, it affected to the way how male sees a friendship. They are may getting afraid of being close to someone with same gender. The stigmatism harshly said that if there are only two males get along together without joining any group, they supposed to be gay. I don’t know sometimes it sounds stupid when only judge someone base on who they are hang out with.
Gender and friendship, expert claimed are virtually all close friendships involve shared interest and activities, various kinds of intimacy including self –disclosure, and the sharing of confidence, emotional support, small talk shop talk and exchange of tangible favors. Therefore any intimates acts of two males can be seen as something strange or weird. They rarely or never touch their friends in order to comfort their friends. It’s so sad when males aren’t able to give different affection like touchy because it’s supposed to be female role. It’s frustrating when you have a female friend but careless and at the same time you have male friend but really care. Some people will bear the fact that they are actually different from what their gender constructs in society. And the result they will lie and just like what they are expected from their gender. And I know it hurts, a lot.
Males tend to value relationships that include shared activities, are less intimate, and transactional. There are also gender differences in the manner in which males and females form and sustain friendships (Tarra Bates-Duford, Ph.D., MFT). Bias between gender friendship forced males to tend to hang out more in a group, “the more the merrier,’ while females typically prefer to go out with one good friend. Once a double standard is activated, it affects the degree of ability that is inferred. In other words, once double standard applied, it affected to the way how male sees a friendship. While looking at the social reactions they usually got mocked by friends. I wonder, why we are so obsessed with gender basic idea. We could be just friends because we care and we want to be friends.
[1] “Session 4 The Social Construction of Gender,” pp. 1–6, 2001.
[2] P. E. Mjaavatn and P. Frostad, “Adolescents : Differences in friendship patterns related to gender,” vol. 26, no. 1, pp. 45–64, 2016.
[3] “Double Standards in the Evaluation of Men and Women *,” vol. 59, no. 3, pp. 237–254, 2011.
[4] S. Parker, “Patterns of Friendship for m and men in same and cross-sex relationship,” 1993.